Friends and family that entered the holy portal of marriage before and after me have since done the responsible thing and started a family, or are getting there really quick, or are talking about taking positive action in that direction. I was always told that when one is with child, people cannot give you enough attention. I wonder how many married (I am Indian after all) and non-pregnant women were questioned before such grossly erroneous conclusions were reached. I think all the attention is on those of us who aren't.
It's probably because I'm at the age where my peers are pushing tiny-tots out by the bushel around me..but I certainly pay more attention to kids now. Especially on flights. Maybe the universe has decided to teach me a lesson for my insubordination - every, and I mean every single flight I have taken in the past year has been miserable for me. There is always at least one, if not multiple angry, ear-splittingly loud little people complaining without compunction about the Lord knows what. The sheer lung power of these things is amazing. I've seen kids that start at the airport in the US, and cry incessantly - give or take a few minutes, all the way to India. We're talking 25+ hours for the most part. Incredible. I would drop from exhaustion if I cried and screamed like that in an hour! I wait with desperation for the transit airport so I can go hide in a bathroom..only to realize someone needs a diaper change or a poopy break. There's no respite I tell you.
My personal favourites are the ones that discover the kick-seat-in-front game. For some reason, this seems to be a very entertaining and amusing activity for a child. Once they know it's driving you nuts, they do it and then laugh. I'm sure I could think of a few counter "games" that would make me laugh a heck of a lot too.
My most recent experience involved a little boy of maybe 3, extremely pissed off with his parent for trying to contain his movement for 2 hours. You know, I saw him and his Mum at the gate and I prayed for them to not be next to me. God was pointing and laughing :(. The boy's methods of protest involved kicking (me), spitting up milk (on me and 3 other people - the spray was fascinating to watch), and screaming at the top of his lungs like there's no tomorrow. I understand children are uncomfortable on flights - air pressure, the constrained atmosphere and all that jazz. But what about the discomfort of other people? I mean, are we to be punished simply because we're adults and forbidden from speaking a word against badly behaved brats? I am extremely motion sick and irritable on an aircraft. I'm tempted to try protesting in the same manner about my discomfort. I doubt that would fly. And that sanctimonious flight attendant who recently divested a parent of her child for daring to try and discipline it. I mean, who is she to intervene? People like that should be thrown in a room full of the world's worst behaved hellions and left there for a day. Let's see how kindly she feels after 24 hours of that.
I had one awesome flight attendant on an international flight where I was stuck next to a kid that hit me, undid my shoelaces, tried to pull my blanket off, and alternately laughed and cried equally loudly through the duration of my flight. The FA gave me chocolate, and said to me as I was stepping off the flight - "Makes you love birth control, dunnit love?" I could have kissed that woman.
As I watch the disapproving looks and mounting irritation in the seats around me, all I can think about is the plight of the poor parents on these trips. People are so quick to say that bad kids has to mean bad parenting. Maybe you just had shitty luck of the draw in the baby department, or are a first time parent who is still learning the ropes, or are just tired of dealing with this on an everyday basis and simply cannot muster up the energy. I don't believe I ever want to be the woman that the whole plane hates and wishes was never let on the flight because I'm having a bad child day.
I wonder why there cannot be an infants and children section on flights, with toys and other things to keep these kids occupied..like a mile-high play date with lots of other kids, oh and soundproof that section of the cabin while you're at it, will you?
